How to find playmates on a swingers dating site


We’ve been using many swingers sites over the years, but we ended up using only two: aff (adultfriendfinder) and fullofdesire.

AFF is definitely the oldest and biggest one, but you have to pay a membership fee to be able to send messages. You have a chance of finding dates there, but only if you are a paid member. Another drawback of aff is that it is swarming with single males, many of whom don’t bother to send anything more eloquent than “wanna f…?’. We also heard that aff has filed for bankruptcy, so its days may be numbered.

That leaves us mostly with fullofdesire. The shortcoming of this site is that it’s new and therefore it does not have many members in every area. But that’s probably its only minus for us. The site is growing fast, we notice new local members every time we login.

We’ve had more luck finding couples and ladies here than on any other site. Here are a few simple rules that came from our experience and help us in our search:

– No matter how good the site is, you won’t succeed if you stay passive. fullofdesire is completely free, so we use this advantage to contact as many couples as we can. The response rate is usually 5 to 10 percent.

– Be patient: People can be busy, or traveling, or seeing someone else at the moment – don’t expect your every message to be answered. But keep trying.

– We don’t usually contact the members whose profiles are empty. Be sure to fill out the descriptions About Me and Who I’d like to meet.

– It is obvious that profiles with photos attract more attention. You don’t have to show your faces, but make sure the photos are of real you.

– Don’t be shy to make as many friends as you can. It’s all free!

– Do not just write “Hi” or “How are you?”. It’s a waste of everyone’s time. In a week you may receive the answer: “Fine” – so what have you achieved? Try to cut the small talk to the minimum. In your first message, introduce yourself briefly, state what you would like to do (meet, talk on the phone first, exchange photos, etc.), tell them when you are available, ask them questions, etc. The more detailed and straightforward your first message is, the more likely you will get a positive response.

Follow these simple rules and you will be rewarded with new encounters and new swinger friends. As we do.

Do you have any dating site rules of your own that might be helpful to others?

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